West Region - Second Round

It's the same in every office. Every year, some chick wins the bracket contest by picking alphabetically, or by famous alumni. Something stupid, that has no basis in which basketball team is actually better.

Well, men can play this game too. I'm breaking down every game of the tournament filling out our bracket by the old standby - "Who'd win in a Fight."

We’re finally ready to go with the second round, after the first proved to be a much more daunting task that we had previously considered.

But quit, we don’t.

Still fresh on our minds, it’s the West Region - Second Round.

1 Kansas Jayhawks vs. 8 Kentucky Wildcats
We found out following the opening round that Kansas would have advanced anyway, because Hawks are apparently natural predators for snakes.

So we could have prepared for a Kansas victory, no matter the outcome.
This time, we actually tried to determine what a Jayhawk is. Apparently it’s a mythical creature that combined two different birds.

Now we’re playing a whole different game. Taking two animals and making them one must give some mythical powers right? I mean, a Bearcat would have an advantage but a regular cat that likes to get drunk and party with strippers? I mean, that’s what I did to get “wild” as a youth.

OK, I ordered pizza and watched my tape of Super Bowl XXVIII.

Jayhawks win.

12 Illinois Illini vs. 13 Holy Cross Crusaders
There’s really not much detail to go into with this match up of Cinderella’s without offending someone.

The historical context is there, and you can look it up.

It’s Bill Simmons’ wet dream - Holy Cross in the Sweet 16. If only he could find someway to involve Larry Bird he’d no doubt leave his wife for the Seminary.

6 Duke Blue Devils vs. 3 Pittsburgh Panthers
Turns out, a Blue Devil is actually some French dudes.

Not just any French dudes, French dudes who - according to the university fought courageously during some war.

Yeah, I’m scared.

In fact, they were such ferocious fighters that they were immortalized in a song by Irving Berlin.

France, show tunes - That answers the question as to why JJ Redick went to Duke.

Pitt advances.

10 Gonzaga Bulldogs vs. 2 UCLA Bruins
I suppose that the bulldog could slobber enough for the Bruins to slip and fall, there by making them vulnerable.

But that isn’t likely, so the Bruins Advance